Guy Ritchie has vowed to fight and save his troubled marriage to Madonna for the sake of their son Rocco.
The film director has pleaded with Madonna to reconsider splitting up because he is terrified he will see less of his boy.
Madonna is planning a permanent move to America, which he fears will make it harder for him to see his son as much as he would like.
Worried Guy, 39, is having sleepless nights and pals have had long, anguished conversations with him about the break-up.
Guy is now heading to New York for a public show of unity with Madonna, 49, while they negotiate their future.
The Sunday Mirror has learned they will be deliberately photographed having dinner this week in Manhattan in an attempt to silence gossip.
But behind-the-scenes Guy is fighting to hold the family together. He took his father John, 80, for lunch in Mayfair, London, on Wednesday - and assured him things will be fine.
A friend of Guy's said: "They met up with as the first reports broke about a divorce. He admitted there are problems and deep frustrations in the relationship. They have been living much of the time apart - something Guy attributes to work pressures.
"But he categorically denied that he will go along with a divorce. He refuses to risk losing full contact with Rocco - or putting his son through a break-up. The £50million he could receive from a divorce settlement pales into insignificance compared to his love for his son."
During a recent drinking session in London, while Madonna was away in New York, Guy spoke of his devotion to Rocco to a male pal.
The friend recalled: "Guy said he felt incredible guilt and torn. He hated to admit it but he inevitably loves Rocco most. He was really missing him. He absolutely adores Lourdes and David and has always treated them as if they were his own. But Rocco is Guy's flesh and blood."
Tensions have been mounting between Guy and Madonna for more than a year. He increasingly feels like a minor player in her life, which revolves around her music career, her Kabalah faith, her kids, and charity and campaigning work.
Guy's biggest fear is being relegated to a more distant part in Rocco's life. Over the years he has become close friends with Lourdes' natural father, personal trainer Carlos Leon.
The film director admires the way Carlos has continued to be a fantastic father and a major part of Lourdes' life.
Madonna jokingly refers to Carlos as "the janitor" - because she still calls him at all hours with problems. She has asked him to oversee renovation work on her Harperly Hall residence overlooking New York's Central Park. But Guy wants to remain a day-to-day dad who doesn't need to plan visits. Another friend said: "Even if the couple have to live separate lives under the same roof, he wants the family to stay as one. He is looking to compromise.
"But Madonna can be very stubborn and ruthless once she has made up her mind. However, she would always want Guy to play a full role in their child's life."
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Tension came to a head when she announced her intention to move back to New York. Madonna wants to live fulltime in her apartment near Central Park with Lourdes, 11, Rocco, seven, and baby David, two. He was filmed with her for an Aids documentary at a Malawi orphanage as she decided to adopt him.
Matters were made worse by her continued need for success with her music. She released new album Hard Candy but was disappointed by its poor reception and sales.
Madge has even negotiated a groundbreaking new deal with promoters Live Nation. It's worth £60million over 10 years, proving she has no plans to quit soon.
She is now preparing for her major Sticky And Sweet world tour to promote the album. It kicks off in Cardiff on August 27 and moves to Europe and the US and winds up at the end of the year.
Another big source of tension between the pair has been her obsession with mystical Jewish faith Kabalah. Guy has now pulled out of the religion after years of dedicated support at his wife's side.
The pal said: "Guy told me recently, 'It could have been worse - she could have become a Scientologist.'
"He said it sarcastically. He had grown tired of the obsession."
Despite Guy's achievements as a filmmaker - he directed Lock, Stock And Two Smoking Barrels and Snatch - he is less ambitious than Madonna. She is driven to be better and better almost at the expense of everything and everyone else in her life. But Guy likes to enjoy life outside work. The source added: "Guy is a laid-back guy. He may have been a successful film director but he is not a total workaholic like Madonna.
"I think sometimes Guy wanted to step back and enjoy life a bit more but Madonna was driven. No matter how much money or how much success, she has to go on, the next tour has to be bigger and the next album has to be better.
"Guy wanted to spend more time at their country place and didn't want to be racing around the world consumed by always being the biggest and the best."
Guy has no desire to be based in the Big Apple, preferring to divide his time between their £7million London town house and their £10million Ashcombe House estate in Wiltshire.
The friend said: "Her love affair with all things English - even Guy himself - seems to have run its course.
"When they got together Madonna became like a Brit. She started speaking with a fake English accent, moved to London and bought a country pile. She took up hunting, shooting and drinking pints of bitter. Now she wants the kids to be educated in New York. Unfortunately, she does not consider what Guy wants. He is expected to fall into line."
But Guy has never enjoyed the New York lifestyle. His next major movie project is to direct a remake of Sherlock Holmes. The source added: "You don't get a more English project than that. He has a settled lifestyle in Britain. He enjoys nights out in the pub that he purchased. Ideally he wants Rocco to be brought up as he was - as an Englishman."
