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FIONA MCINTOSH
PC madness is bum deal for all of us
Gail Jordan thought it would be a laugh to reprint a photograph of her son as a baby and stick it on the top of his 21st birthday cake.
The Queen is said to be furious
The Queen is said to be furious because she can't afford to mend her crumbling palaces. Apparently Buck Palace needs some serious re-wiring and it hasn't seen a lick of paint since 1956, which means it must look shabbier than my own front room. And that's hard.
View to a killing
Opening the mail the other day, I found a letter marked with those three sick-making words: Penalty Charge Notice. But I haven't been given a parking fine - what's going on? Turns out I was caught stopping for a few minutes outside the train station to let my mother-in-law out of the car so she could dash for her train. And that moment cost me £120.
more from Fiona McIntosh
ANNA SMITH
Seize drug gangs' loot
I keep hearing about police making huge inroads on crime lords. Three times more crack seized in Scotland last year, and cocaine hauls up 80 per cent.
It's scandalous - our boys are risking their lives
Our boys in Afghanistan are risking their lives for a basic pay of £12,000, says Army chief General Sir Richard Dannatt.
Yob's too easy lesson
Yob Darren McFarlane, 16, was part of a wrecking crew on an orgy of destruction in St Martin's Primary School, in Glasgow. They did so much damage it had to be demolished. Did the law teach him a lesson? Did it stuff. The little toerag got 130 hours' community service
more Anna Smith
MARK AUSTIN
Gord help Zimbabwe
This weekend Gordon Brown celebrates his first year in power. Though celebrate, of course, isn't quite the word.
Nelson Mandela saved my day
So Nelson Mandela came to London this week to celebrate his 90th birthday.
Grammar lessons
The Schools Secretary Ed Balls doesn't support selection and wants no more grammar schools.
more from Mark Austin
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